The Day An Alpaca Flobbed On My Beard
My latest country column for The Guardian's Life And Style Section.
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Why Reading Online Reviews Of Your Book Will Lead You Nowhere Good
Subscribe now I try my best not to read website reviews of my books. Even the nice ones. I haven’t looked at GoodReads since about 2017-18 because I know it’s not going to improve my life even fractionally, and while I haven’t been able to resist finding
A Brief, Unsparingly Honest Guide To The Real British Countryside From Someone Who Knows
Subscribe now It comes as something of a surprise to me to realise I have now been living in the British countryside for five full decades. Before those conclusion-jumping folks amongst you read that statement and think “Oh, this guy is clearly a Grade-A bumpkin with no idea of how
My Ex-Husband's Landlady
My ex-husband’s landlady is 77 years old, five feet nine and a quarter inches tall, with broad shoulders, size seven feet and hair as wild as the kind of unidentifiable weed that you might one day find growing at the top of some steps. She lives at the crest
Black Dog
My cat Roscoe - who some of you might have been introduced to recently via her more vapid alter ego - turns 14 this month. She's a healthy cat, young for her age, which makes my mind boggle a bit as it hits me that precisely ten years